Marion's Communication Tips

Sometimes communications can be scary. Maybe a certain person intimidates you. Or perhaps you've been asked to talk on a subject you know little about. Or you have zero time to prepare. Whatever the reason, there are moments we all experience hesitation before we speak. If there’s a call you need to make, or someone you want to connect with but feel frightened to do so, here’s a tip gleaned from a chapter, “Facing the Chicken Within” penned by me and my sister, Joan Grobb Augustino, fellow author, trainer and professional speaker (www.coreperformancegroup.com)

• Push to peak performance: When we’re frightened, we get that little jolt of adrenaline. Channel that energy to your performance -- don't waste it on nerves. Let F-E-A-R stand for “face, embrace and replace” fear with action. Pick up that phone and call who you need to call. Use that adrenalin to add energy to your voice and move yourself to action.

Fear doesn’t need to hold you back. In fact, if you listen to your chicken within, it can push you ahead and point you to areas of great growth. So get out there, and start communicating with pluck!

Begin small. Think of one tiny communication challenge you are afraid of doing and what a difference it would make in your life. Imagine if you spoke with authority, communicated assertively, developed instant rapport with others. Whatever communication goal you have, take a small step in that direction. Make it tiny and not time-consuming so you will be sure to do it. Return that phone call you've been ignoring. Go for coffee and nuture informal communications. Try saying a couple words in a new language ... in front of people. Make it bite-size, make it real, make it yours. Face, embrace and replace fear, with action. Even if that action begins as a small one.

PS: if you're interested in learning more about facing YOUR chicken within, check out that and all my upcoming and past webinars available to help you in 60-minute power hours http://www.marionspeaks.com/marions-products/webinars/webinar-singles

Until next time, here's to ...
Better communication, Better business, Better life,
Marion Grobb Finkelstein
COMMUNICATION CATALYST
Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author
www.MarionSpeaks.com
Marion@MarionSpeaks.com
www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks  

Are you planning a conference, employee gathering or management retreat and looking for presenters? I'd love to submit a proposal for your consideration. Please contact me Marion@MarionSpeaks.com

© 2012 Marion Grobb Finkelstein
WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete tagline with it: Communication catalyst, author, and professional speaker Marion Grobb Finkelstein teaches individuals and organizations across Canada and beyond, how to improve morale, confidence and productivity by changing how they communicate. Get weekly hands-on tips by signing up for "Marion's Communication Tips" at www.MarionSpeaks.com

It's Not About You When you give presentations, does your mouth go dry? Your heart beat a little faster? Your palms get sweaty? As you prepare to meet one-to-one with a top level client or senior official, are the butterflies in your stomach doing somersaults? If so, you're not alone. One of the most common questions I get is about controlling nerves when presenting. Without hesitation, I offer this suggestion ... COMMUNICATION TIP: Focus on your audience, not yourself A lot of people get nervous speaking to others, whether it's one-to-one or to the masses. Speaking and communication jitters can get the best of us and can jeopardize how effectively we connect with our colleagues, client, bosses and employees. The way to get over it? Focus on the needs of your audience and your role in meeting those needs. Remember this -- you have a message someone needs to hear. Each one of us has information or expertise of some sort that would benefit someone else. What's yours? Ask yourself this question: QUESTION: what information or knowledge do I have that would help someone else (who?) do his or her job better, faster, cheaper, easier? Know your audience. Find out what they need, what keeps them up at night, and how you can help them. Discover where they "hurt", what they lack, and fill that void with your skill, expertise and advice. Communicate valuable information and share your know-how.   THE LIMITED ENERGY THEORY Here's the reality: we all have limited energy, so spend yours wisely. Focus your energies on getting to know the people with whom you communicate. That could be your boss -- find out his or her top priorities and figure out how you can support them. Maybe your colleagues need help in a project, and you have the expertise to make the difference. Why not offer it and lend your know-how? Or perhaps you have clients you're trying to click with. Ask them questions and delve into how you can marry your expertise to their challenges and find solutions. Using communication skills to ask the right questions and provide the right answers is what will help you to connect with others. Ask, ask, ask. And it all begins with how you think, which leads me to my next point ... COME FROM A PLACE OF SERVICE Let me explain this term "service" for a moment, so as not to lead you astray. I'm saying "come from a place of service" -- not servitude. You're not someone's servant. You are choosing to apply your skills to serve. You are committing to a motivation bigger than just you. You are making a difference in someone else's life because you deem that person worthy and because you know you can help. That's service, not servitude. You're not someone's slave, you choose to serve and you do so willingly.   Communication is really about knowing how we can serve others. Add to that "knowing yourself" and your own strengths, and that's an unbeatable combination. It provides the foundation for great communications because it puts the focus on your audience, not you. And that type of attitude is what gets results. Hey, have you checked out my new Facebook splashpage? If you haven't yet "liked" my page, visit it now and see what I mean www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks Until next time, here's to ... Positive communication, Productive relationships, Powerful results! Marion Grobb Finkelstein Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author www.MarionSpeaks.com Marion@MarionSpeaks.com www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks   © 2011 Marion Grobb Finkelstein WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete tagline with it: Get more hands-on communication tips on Marion's Facebook www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks , book her for your next gathering Marion@MarionSpeaks.com and sign up for her FREE weekly "Marion's Communication Tips" at www.MarionSpeaks.com . Communications expert, author, professional speaker Marion Grobb Finkelstein teaches individuals and organizations across Canada and beyond, how to increase morale, confidence and productivity by changing the way they communicate.

I often get emails from people asking some excellent communication-related questions. Many of you are likely wondering the same things, so I'll be responding to these questions from time to time via my "Marion's Communication Tips" enewsletter. If you have a question or communication challenge you'd like to share, drop me a line at Marion@MarionSpeaks.com and you might be featured in a future edition. (PS: I use first names only and always ask permission to use your story first. I also may take a few editing liberties to shorten the text). And now, on to this week's question ...

QUESTION: "Marion, your recent newsletter about (the importance of) response times brought a flood of instances to mind where I was less than prompt getting back to clients. I met with a client the other day -- 10 days after our initial contact. Files just pile up, not to mention having to act as team lead and fill in extra shifts while co-workers were on holiday. I find myself having to make excuses for why I haven't contacted people sooner. I suppose the right thing to do would have been to take a few minutes to let her know I hadn't forgotten about her."
Signed, Overwhelmed in Edmonton  

MARION'S RESPONSE:
Dear Overwhelmed, you are not alone. It seems everyone these days is expected to do more with less. The proverbial "fat" has been cut so severely in some organizations, that the powers that be have succeeded in cutting into muscle. It's difficult to live in an environment of increasing expectations and reduced resources. And this type of workplace defintely puts a strain on how we communicate. Stress always does. So here's some tips:

• MANAGE EXPECTATIONS -- BEGIN WITH YOURS. You can only do what you can do. Even the most organized and productive person has a breaking point. Know what your boundaries are and when you're approaching them, then tell yourself it's OK to admit that you're human. Set challenging and reasonable goals for yourself and allow yourself some breathing and "contingency" room to get things done.
• MANAGE EXPECTATIONS -- THEIRS. Once you know what your timelines and boundaries are, communicate that to the person waiting for your response. They might not like being told that you'll be getting back to them next week instead of tomorrow. They might even be upset and disappointed. Even this is better than them thinking you're responding tomorrow and them getting more angry by the day when you don't respond for a week. As difficult as it may be, explain the reality. No communication at all is a void, and if you don't fill it with information and expectation, the client will fill it with anxiety, anger and disappointment. And those emotions destroy relationships ... and business.
• MEET EXPECTATIONS -- BOTH OF YOURS. Now that you've set the expectations, make sure you meet them. When you say you're going to do something, do it. It's as simple as that. That's how you build credibility and distinguish yourself from the competition. Much better to have a client, colleague, boss or employee dealing with a realistic expectation and you meeting it, than just thinking you're not responding at all. It lowers the stress for both of you.

For the past month or so, I've been shopping for "just the right" couch. I finally found one last week. It was the right colour (well, OK, it's a tad darker than I'd like -- life is full of compromises, right?), the right size (maybe just a smidgen too large, though it still fits), the right price (hey, leather's expensive so a higher price is justifiable, isn't it?) ... and then the delivery date. What?! Eight to ten weeks? Are you kidding me?

At first, I couldn't believe the lengthy waiting period. We have already sold our old couches and are watching TV in the rec room downstairs while our upstairs family room is being renovated. As nostalgic as this "college dorm" look is, I wasn't planning on two and a half months of this. Then the salesman said something that made a lot of sense. He explained, "Most other furniture places will tell you they'll deliver in 6 to 8 weeks, but that's just not so. We tell people 8 to 10 weeks, because that's what it really is. And if you get it early, bonus."

He was absolutely right. Now I know that we'll be a couple months without our furniture and I'm planning on using that time to paint, refinish the floors, and choose accessories. In other words -- he communicated a realistic situation and managed my expectations. I, in turn, am grateful to him for being upfront. You can use this same technique with your clients and work mates. I think this approach sets that furniture company apart from many others. You can position yourself uniquely too, just by being upfront about managing expectations.

When you find yourself overwhelmed and simply unable to respond when you (or they) hoped, let the people know. You deserve to be relieved of undue stress and your client deserves an answer, if only to advise them when you'll respond in full. That's managing expectations, stress, and relationships. Allow yourself some breathing room and keep others up to date. Now, that's worth communicating.

WHERE ON EARTH IS MARION? In addition to communication coaching and consulting, here's where I'm presenting in the next few months. If you're attending, let me know! Or if I'm coming to your area and your organization is interested in receiving communication training, just drop me a line at Marion@MarionSpeaks.com :   June 8, 2011: OMSSA (Ottawa, Ont) June 15, 2011: Vitalize (Edmonton, Alberta) July 27: IAAP Education Forum and Annual Meeting (Montreal, Quebec)

Until next time, here's to ...
Better communication, Better business, Better life!
Marion Grobb Finkelstein
Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author

www.MarionSpeaks.com
Marion@MarionSpeaks.com
www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks  

© 2011 Marion Grobb Finkelstein
WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete tagline with it: Communications expert, author, professional speaker Marion Grobb Finkelstein teaches individuals and organizations across Canada and beyond, how to improve their businesses and their lives by improving their communications. Chat with her Facebook www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks  or sign up for her FREE weekly e-newsletter "Marion's Communication Tips" at www.MarionSpeaks.com

Ahhhh, it's Valentine's Day again. That time of year when Cupid points his arrow at the hearts of many and people express how much they care for each other. What are you doing to celebrate?

This past weekend, I helped organize the "Hopewell LOVE YOUR LIFE Valentine's Gala", raising funds for the Hopewell Eating Disorder Support Centre. Over 160 people gathered for a night of dinner, dance, silent auction and raffles, all to help this organization of 3 staff members serving all of Eastern Ontario. Wow! We were delighted to raise over $8,000, especially as Hopewell receives no ongoing government support.

As wonderful as all those things are, what really strikes me about this event is how it truly is a celebration of LOVE and LIFE. It's about telling yourself that being healthy comes in all shapes and sizes, not just the ones the media or model world tell us. I find this event is aptly named and a reminder to LOVE YOUR LIFE. Do you? Do you love your life? Or do you look at it and consider everything you're missing instead of everything you've got? Do you look at yourself through kind and non-judgemental eyes, or do you dole out harsh criticism upon yourself?

Our self-talk is often a reflection of how we love ourselves. How do you respond when you make a mistake, have an oversight, suffer from foot-in-mouth disease, or do a faux pas of some sort? The big question is: what does that little voice inside your head say at those moments? Are you as kind to yourself as you are to others? We all have goof-ups at one time or another, so of course you do too. We all do. Welcome to the human race.

TO SEE THE REST OF THIS ARTICLE AND OTHERS, SIGN UP FOR "MARION'S COMMUNICATION TIPS" AT www.MarionSpeaks.com

I'm about to tell you something  that few people know about me: I was on the silver screen in a movie. Sure, it was a bit part about 15 years ago ... and it was MY bit part. I did it!

Back track about 20 years: I was hosting cablevision shows and doing radio and TV ads, all while holding down hefty fulltime communication positions. Then, I decided I'd try my hand at acting. Being in a movie was one of those things on my "bucket list" and I figured it was worth a shot. Regardless of the outcome, I reminded myself, it would make for a good story from my rocking chair in the years ahead.

The day of the auditions, I walked into the hall in Montreal, determined to wow the casting agents with my acting abilities. Surely they would notice my subtle raise of an eyebrow, the inflection in my voice, the dramatic animation I brought to the role of the airport security agent. I was convinced it would be my acting that won them over.

A few weeks later, the call came -- I got the part! When I asked what it was that swayed their decision in my favor, I expected to hear something about my abilities, my performance, my outstanding way of connecting with the audience. Ya, right. Instead, what they told me was surprising: it was my outfit. Yup, they figured that I "looked the part", literally, and anything else I needed, they could teach me.

So let's tie that lesson into the workplace. Do you look the part that you're aiming for? Does your image project not just the job you have, but the one you want? So much of the information we gain through face-to-face communication is garnered through visual clues, it's important that we recognize this fact and use it to our advantage.

Sometimes we get gut feelings about people and we're not really sure why. Often when we analyze the "why", we discover that it's visual clues that have led us, rightly or wrongly, to certain conclusions. We see someone who is dressed slovenly, is unkempt, has dirty fingernails and food spills on their clothing, and we believe that they are as unconsientious about their work as they are about their appearance. It could be that nothing is further from the truth, but we quite naturally respond to visual clues. Perhaps this person was just in a car accident and that would explain their frazzled look. Or maybe they'd stayed up all night to complete a report for the boss; that's a good thing, right? Something to be commended, not looked down upon.

POINT: People don't know our back story, they only know how we present ourselves to them... and we may or may not have a chance to explain.

In a less extreme way, we sometimes see people dressing completely appropriately for their particular work environment, but that work environment might not be right for them. If you are expected to wear conservative suits and carry a briefcase and that's not in line with how you see YOURSELF, that's incongruent. Talk to people who have left organizations readily (sometimes skipping and singing, "I'm free, I'm free!") and they'll tell you that it's often because the image the organization had of its employees did not match the image they had of themselves.

 

It is a commonly held belief that judging a book by its cover is shallow. That may be true. It's also the way humans respond. I say, use that fact to your advantage and make your image help you put your best foot forward in the workplace.

Until next time, here's to ...

Positive communication,

Productive relationships,

Powerful results!

Marion Grobb Finkelstein

Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author

www.MarionSpeaks.com

Marion@MarionSpeaks.com

www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks 

 

© 2011 Marion Grobb Finkelstein

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete tagline with it: Communications expert, author, professional speaker Marion Grobb Finkelstein teaches individuals and organizations across Canada and beyond, how to improve their businesses and their lives by improving their communications. Chat with her Facebook www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks  or sign up for her FREE weekly e-newsletter "Marion's Communication Tips" at www.MarionSpeaks.com

This past weekend, I had the pleasure of attending my university (Brock) Alumni weekend. I went to a couple events and it was wonderful to rekindle old friendships and meet some new people too. We laughed about the "old times", got caught up on what the past 30 years has brought, and are already looking forward to next year's reuinion to do it all over again. During both the pub night and the next day barbecue, I couldn't help but notice the different ways people mix and mingle.

When was the last time you went to a function where people were networking? Maybe it was a company going-away party for a colleague, or perhaps a convention. Were you one of those people pressing the flesh and moving  effortlessly to chat with others? Or were you like the vast majority and didn't quite know where to begin?

If you're not networking, you're missing opportunities to connect, strengthen existing relationships and build new ones. Here's a few tips you can use to allow you to mix and mingle like a pro:

THINK STRATEGICALLY. Before you attend an event, think about who you would LIKE to meet and speak with and why? What is it that you would like to say to them and why would they be interested (what's in it for them?). You may have specific names of people, or just the "type" of person you want to meet, e.g., someone from company XYZ.

CONTACT PEOPLE IN ADVANCE. It's often possible to connect with people in advance of a function. Sometimes, through word of mouth and by asking your colleagues, you can find out who's attending and get in touch with them. Your meet-up plan can be as casual as "we'll see you at the conference", or as formal as setting a meeting time and place.

APPROACH PEOPLE YOU DON'T KNOW. Take a risk, randomly go over to someone you don't know and spark up a conversation. But how? Ask a few key questions as conversation openers. Focus on what you two would have in common -- the venue and the event. You could ask open ended questions such as, "What made you decide to attend this conference? What do you hope to get out of it? Or if it's a private function, ask him or her how they know the host/s.  

If you have great stories about mixing and mingling, let me know. I'd love to hear what techniques you've used, or how the ones above help. Now get out there to that next event and put these strategies to use. Go mix and mingle with confidence. And remember to bring lots of biz cards, you'll need them!

Until next time, here's to ...
Positive communication,
Productive relationships,
Powerful results!

Marion Grobb Finkelstein
Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author
www.MarionSpeaks.com
www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks
Marion@MarionSpeaks.com

© 2010 Marion Grobb Finkelstein

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete tagline with it: Communications expert, author, professional speaker Marion Grobb Finkelstein teaches individuals and organizations across Canada and beyond, how to improve their businesses and their lives by improving their communications. Chat with her Facebook www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks or sign up for her FREE weekly e-newsletter "Marion's Communication Tips" at www.MarionSpeaks.com.

I woke up this morning to a wonderful surprise. My husband was tiling the bathroom floor, something we've been meaning to do for a while. He had just started the job, knowing we were going away for the weekend and wanting to get it done before our company arrives next week. He was working so hard! He had completed the basement bathroom (call it the "practice run") last week in a wonderful staggered pattern of the rectangular tiles and was going to duplicate his handiwork upstairs.

About an hour into it, I popped my head in to see how it was going. Looking down at the main bathroom floor, I saw that all the edges of the tiles were in rigid straight lines on all sides. A little puzzled, I asked, "oh, you're not staggering the tiles?" Steve's response was immediate. Oh no, what had he done, he said aloud. He chided himself for missing the obvious. How could he have done this? What a waste of time and materials, he scolded.

My reaction was equally quick. I was very grateful and appreciative of his effort, and although I preferred the staggered pattern, realized that this linear style wasn't a "mistake", just a different way of doing it. I was in awe that he even knew how to do tiling (I'm not great at household repairs, so I admire those who are). I thought all these things in the span of half a second (emotions move faster than words), and then I spoke.

After gingerly assessing the situation, I pointed out that it wasn't too late to make a change, that all the tiles didn't need to be lifted and replaced, only the alternate rows. He had finished partial rows at this point, so that meant a total of six tiles that needed lifting and replacing. Whew, what a relief! What at first seemed overwhelming was now very manageable.

We removed the fresh tiles, got the new ones ready and in about a half hour, Steve had caught up and recovered from this oversight. I then realized that he hadn't yet eaten breakfast, so I made a couple toasts and brought it to him.

As I was waiting for the toaster, I got thinking how my immediate response was one of support and problem-solving. I said nothing but positives. Then I compared that to how I would have talked to myself if it had been ME who messed up. I can assure you, I would have been harsh.

So here's the lesson: be as supportive to yourself when you mess up as you are with other people.

Cut yourself some slack. We're all human and none of us is perfect. It's OK to make mistakes, because if you're never making mistakes, you're not trying hard enough.

How we speak to ourselves evidences how worthy we think we are, and this becomes the foundation of how we believe we deserve for the world to speak to us. Next time when you're ready to give yourself a tongue lashing, step back and ask how you would respond if you were talking to someone you loved, someone who was doing the best he or she knew how, someone you valued. That "someone" is you.

How you communicate with yourself, your self-talk, influences how others communicate with you. Teach them well.

PS: Hey, are you part of my Facebook biz page? Just visit www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks and click "like". Join the MarionSpeaks community chats on the web!

Until next time, here's to ...
Positive communication,
Productive relationships,
Powerful results!

Marion Grobb Finkelstein
Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author
www.MarionSpeaks.com
Marion@MarionSpeaks.com 

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© 2010 Marion Grobb Finkelstein

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete tagline with it: Communications expert, author, professional speaker Marion Grobb Finkelstein teaches individuals and organizations across Canada and beyond, how to improve their businesses and their lives by improving their communications. Chat with her Facebook www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks or sign up for her FREE weekly e-newsletter "Marion's Communication Tips" at www.MarionSpeaks.com.

A friend of mine said something recently that was very insightful and I'd like to share it with you.

 

We'd been chatting and emailing each other about my article on "nayslayers". You may recall it - I was talking about people who are quick to rain on a parade and point out everything wrong with an idea, and slow to suggest something that could actually work instead. He emailed back to me a saying that popped into his head, "Ride the tide or get out of the boat". Thanks Mark, what an excellent suggestion!

 

The essence of the message is this: go along with an idea and row in the same direction as the leader. Trust. Support. Give it a shot. And if you can't do that, then get out of the way of those who want to (get out of the boat).

 

I'm reminded about a story I often tell during my presentations. It's about the geese I often see in our backyard and on the lake. When they fly, it's always in a "V" formation because it's aerodynamic to do so. All of them take turns being the lead goose and the others honk behind him or her -- and they honk loudly, let me tell you!

 

That honking used to somewhat irritate me until one day my sister Joan explained exactly why they do that. She told me that it's to encourage the head goose.

 

So here's the question: when you "honk", what do you say? Do you discourage the leader, the person who's taking the risk and sticking their neck out? Do you say everything you can to bring him or her down? Try to get the others in the flock to turn around and go in a different direction? Or do you shout, "way to go"? What are your communications saying?

 

Or are you remaining silent thinking that this is enough to show support? It's not. Leaders and teammates need to hear encouragement from their team members as much as team members need to hear it from their leaders.

 

Like geese and with time, each of us often gets a turn to lead the group. Sometimes, it's only then that we realize how important those "honks" can be.

 

Make sure that your "honks" are encouraging ones and "ride the tide" at least for a while. If you don't, at the next opportunity that goes swimming by, you just might find that you've missed the boat.  

 

PS:  Marion please offer any comments you may have about this article on www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks -- looking forward to hearing from you!

 

Until next time,

Better communication, better business, better life,

Marion Grobb Finkelstein

Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author

www.MarionSpeaks.com

Marion@MarionSpeaks.com

Today is Father's Day. This is the time of year we set aside to honor the man who gave us life and who raised us -- and if we're really lucky, it's the same person.

 

My father passed away in 1994. Rarely does a day go by when he is not in my thoughts, and this is exactly how he lives on -- through my memories. I find myself today thinking about the vestiges my father left behind, the things he taught us that live on to this day.

 

I remember I was working in Ottawa and coming home from a business trip celebrating National Transportation Week in Thunder Bay. I decided to detour to the Niagara Region to visit my parents before returning to Ottawa. My mother had gone to Saturday night church service which left my father and me alone for a rare mother-daughter moment.

 

Somehow we got chatting about his upbringing. Between the ages of 5 and 7 years old, my father lost three sisters and both his parents to illnesses. My dad and his two surviving sisters were sent off to live with their aunt and uncle and their children. I was aware of these details but had never heard my father speak of them directly. I was amazed at his strength.

 

I leaned into the table, closer to my dad, looking him dead in the eye and I asked him, "Dad, whatever could you have learned from this tremendous loss at such a young age". He answered in a heartbeat with one word. He said, "empathy".

 

Until the day my father died, he lived his life looking at others through the lens of empathy. He didn't judge or admonish other's behaviours -- he simply put himself into their shoes and earnestly allowed himself to see the world from their viewpoint. He had gotten the message out of the mess. He refused to be a victim and instead, was a victor.

 

Today, as we all honor our fathers present, past, and those who will be fathers one day, I invite you to look at others through the lens of empathy. If someone communicates roughly with you, it could be they're having a rough day. If someone is curt or impatient, it may have nothing to do with you. If someone feels threatened or scared and refuses to help you by stepping to the plate, they may be coming from a place of insecurity.

 

My father taught me that coming from a place of empathy helps relationships and communication. Try it out, and when you find yourself saying, "Holy Moses, this stuff really works", you can thank my dad. I know I do.

 

Happy father's day to all.

 

PS: Come see this article posted and add your comments on my Facebook page at www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks Let's chat in between e-newsletters.

Until next time,

Better communication, better business, better life,

Marion Grobb Finkelstein

Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author

www.MarionSpeaks.com

Marion@MarionSpeaks.com

 

Recipient of APEX "Award for Leadership in Service Innovation"

Marion@MarionSpeaks.com

www.MarionSpeaks.com

613-983-TALK (8255)

• ·Marion is a contributing author to "Award-Winning Finalist USA BOOK NEWS Non-Fiction: Anthologies" book, "The Power of the Platform: Speakers on Success", featuring 21 authors including Jack Canfield, Brian Tracy and Tana Goertz. See http://www.marionspeaks.com/bk-popsuccess_70.html   

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My mother has taught me many lessons throughout my life, some knowingly and some without her consciously being aware she was teaching. One of the biggest lessons I learned was that life's a gamble.

When was the last time you took a risk, stepped out of your comfort zone and experienced great uncertainty? Perhaps you're in a new job, engaged to be married, or trying an avant-garde medical procedure. In whatever direction your life is headed, it's your decisions, risks, and gambles that are leading you there.

You can't control what life rolls in your direction, you can, however, control the way you respond, so why not stack the deck in your favor? Here's a few strategies that will help you do exactly that.

• Ask questions.

Knowing how to ask the right questions of the right people can help you make informed decisions and increase your odds of success. It can also shorten a steep and expensive learning curve. Think about who has information you could use, and then go ask them for it.

• Build on your experience.

With every gamble you take, you learn. You discover what works, and perhaps more importantly, what doesn't. As your knowledge, experience, and contact lists grow, so too does your confidence. You are in a better position to take a gamble because you know that you have the skills to make informed choices.

• Know your comfort zone.

When I worked in Reno, Nevada, a colleague told me a tip I will never forget. It's helped guide me in making decisions and in taking risks (or not). He said, "Never gamble more than you're prepared to lose". That doesn't mean never gamble - it means, take your chances with eyes wide open and be willing to live with the worst case scenario. If you can't, then that risk is not for you.

Winners understand that the roll of the dice is random. Sometimes you win, and sometimes - unfairly and even though all logic would suggest otherwise - you lose. Bad things just happen. Winners get that fact. They realize that life will deal them hands that aren't fair. It's not personal and it does not devalue them. It's not justice, it just is.

Life really is a gamble. So grab your cards, roll the dice, and let the games begin.

PS: lf you are planning a conference or retreat and need an uplifting message for your team, this "Life's a Gamble" keynote fits the bill. Let's talk.

PPS: Come see this article posted and add your comments on my Facebook page at www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks Let's chat in between e-newsletters.

 

Until next time,

Better communication, better business, better life,

Marion Grobb Finkelstein

Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author

www.MarionSpeaks.com

Marion@MarionSpeaks.com

 

Recipient of APEX "Award for Leadership in Service Innovation"

Marion@MarionSpeaks.com

www.MarionSpeaks.com

613-983-TALK (8255)

• ·Marion is a contributing author to "Award-Winning Finalist USA BOOK NEWS Non-Fiction: Anthologies" book, "The Power of the Platform: Speakers on Success", featuring 21 authors including Jack Canfield, Brian Tracy and Tana Goertz. See http://www.marionspeaks.com/bk-popsuccess_70.html   

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