Marion's Communication Tips

Hour of Power

Do you know when is your "hour of power"? You might not know when it is, because you don't realize what it is, so let's start there.

(PS: take a peek at my brand new "Hour of Power" webinars: http://www.marionspeaks.com/marions-products/webinars Invest one hour of your time, and I'll give you ways to change how you communicate, boost your work performance and increase the results you get.. Satisfaction guaranteed. Interested?)

"HOUR OF POWER" IS YOUR HIGH ENERGY TIME

The "hour of power" is the time of day when you feel most energetic, most alert, and most on your game. What's yours?

This time is different for everyone. For you, it might be early morning when you hop out of bed and right into action. Or maybe you prefer to ease into your day slowly and you feel more energized as the day wears on. Perhaps you catch your stride in the afternoon, and that's when you're really in the groove. Or maybe you're more an evening person and find yourself in high form in the after-dinner or late hours of the evening.

Still not sure what hour chimes your power? Then do this: think back to the past weeks. If this wasn't a typical week for you, pick the week before. What time of day did you find you were sharpest? When were you most productive, most organized, most roaring to go?

Need some more help to define your hour? Ask yourself this: when you're on holidays or during weekends, what's your natural circadian rhythm? When are you most powered up? When does your energy flow? Figure this out, and you have a key to great communication.

YOUR HOUR OF POWER IS THE TIME TO TACKLE YOUR TOUGHEST COMMUNICATION CHALLENGES

Now that you've defined your "hour of power", you're positioned to use that information strategically. Plan to work on your toughest communication challenges when you have the most energy. It makes imminent sense. It takes brain power to solve any type of problem, including communication ones. You'll be more likely to find the solutions when you're at your sharpest. The options will come to you more readily.

Likewise, it takes energy to demonstrate control. If you're dealing with a contentious issue, doing so when you have the most energy will increase your chances of using cautious restraint, thinking with a clear head and having a positive outcome. Thanks to your hour of power.

Now you know when you are most likely to best handle tough communications. Put the odds in your favor and use the "hour of power" to best help empower you. You've got the power, and now you know where to find and how to use it. Power on!

Comments about this article? Go one and post them on my blog at http://www.marionspeaks.com/_blog/Marions_Communication Tips

Until next time, here's to ...
Better communication, Better business, Better life,
Marion Grobb Finkelstein
COMMUNICATION CATALYST
Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author
www.MarionSpeaks.com
Marion@MarionSpeaks.com
www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks  

© 2011 Marion Grobb Finkelstein
WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete tagline with it: Communication specialist, author, professional speaker Marion Grobb Finkelstein teaches individuals and organizations across Canada and beyond, how to improve morale, confidence and productivity by changing how they communicate. Chat with her at www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks and sign up for her FREE weekly "Marion's Communication Tips" at www.MarionSpeaks.com

THE 24-HOUR RULE

Have you ever found yourself in that awkward situation where you’re disappointed, upset or angry with someone and you don’t know quite how to tell them? It happens everyday in workplaces across the country.

When a situation is especially volatile, emotions run high, and when emotions run high, people say things they probably shouldn't. When you feel threatened, attacked or think you have a lot to lose, your instinct may be to run and hide (flight) or to fight back, hard. Running away is seldom the right thing to do, though it does have its place. Perhaps putting up a fight is exactly the right response, though replying with a knee-jerk, angst-filled reaction is not. It just won't serve you well.

Susan was a manager is a large national non-profit organization. She worked very closely with other managers and was quite successful at getting things done through influence, as she had no direct authority over the divisions of her peers. She got along with everyone except one. His name was David and he was a son-of-a-gun.

David would respond to Susan's email with point-by-point lengthy rebuttals. He would cc a barrage of people on emails which appeared to Susan as though he were grandstanding in front of an audience. Instead of working collaboratively, it appeared that he fought her solid, well-presented recommendations every step of the way.

Susan's normal response was to reply politely, professionally and promptly to David's emails that came to feel like public attacks. To break the email monotony and in the hopes of making a personal connection, every now and then she picked up the phone and responded immediately verbally then followed up with a written reply. All this was taking enormous amounts of energy and time. The opportunity cost was that Susan came in early and worked late to stay on top of the rest of her workload. It was exhausting and sucked the fun out of going in to the office every day. Every time it seemed that Susan reached out to reply to David, her hand was slapped.

Then she had an epiphany: change the dance.

After too many sleepless nights, Susan realized that she could change the dynamics of her working relationship with David by changing how she responded to him. No more would she respond immediately, especially on volatile subjects. She decided she would apply the "24-hour rule". That is, she would draft or think about her response then sit on it for 24 hours before sending it. It worked. David continued dashing off detail-laden emails, several a day, and when he got no immediate response, the emails slowed down. Susan's responses were less harried, more strategic and general in nature, and the 24-hour rule gave her more time to tend to her many other duties.

Perhaps you've found yourself in a situation similar to Susan (true story, names have been changed) where you've felt pressured to respond, or you were so upset you wanted to respond immediately. Something angers you and you feel you must reply to preserve your reputation or to present your argument before a decision is made or an action taken. Sometimes time really is of the essence, though, more often, waiting a day to respond is completely reasonable.

COMMUNICATION TIP: Apply the 24-hour rule. Give yourself time before you respond.

When dealing with a prickly, emotionally charged subject, cool your jets before you communicate. Give yourself 24 hours to breathe, to step back, gain perspective and plan how you will best connect. Then, once you've had a chance to gather your thoughts and compile a response that's going to work best for you and others, move to action. This measured approach will save relationships ... and careers.

I have found the “24-hour” rule to be invaluable. It has helped me many times over the years. And it’s available to help you too. Before responding with knee-jerk emotion, before picking up the phone or pushing “send” on the email, give it 24 hours. You’ll appreciate the difference a day makes. So will your colleague on the receiving end.

Comments about this article? Share them below by posting a blog.

Until next time, here's to ...
Better communication, Better business, Better life,
Marion Grobb Finkelstein
COMMUNICATION CATALYST
Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author
www.MarionSpeaks.com
Marion@MarionSpeaks.com
www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks

© 2011 Marion Grobb Finkelstein
WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete tagline with it: Communications expert, author, professional speaker Marion Grobb Finkelstein teaches individuals and organizations across Canada and beyond, how to improve morale, confidence and productivity by changing how they communicate. Chat with her at www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks or sign up for her FREE weekly e-newsletter "Marion's Communication Tips" at www.MarionSpeaks.com

I often get emails from people asking some excellent communication-related questions. Many of you are likely wondering the same things, so I'll be responding to these questions from time to time via my "Marion's Communication Tips" enewsletter. If you have a question or communication challenge you'd like to share, drop me a line at Marion@MarionSpeaks.com and you might be featured in a future edition. (PS: I use first names only and always ask permission to use your story first. I also may take a few editing liberties to shorten the text). And now, on to this week's question ...

QUESTION: "Marion, your recent newsletter about (the importance of) response times brought a flood of instances to mind where I was less than prompt getting back to clients. I met with a client the other day -- 10 days after our initial contact. Files just pile up, not to mention having to act as team lead and fill in extra shifts while co-workers were on holiday. I find myself having to make excuses for why I haven't contacted people sooner. I suppose the right thing to do would have been to take a few minutes to let her know I hadn't forgotten about her."
Signed, Overwhelmed in Edmonton  

MARION'S RESPONSE:
Dear Overwhelmed, you are not alone. It seems everyone these days is expected to do more with less. The proverbial "fat" has been cut so severely in some organizations, that the powers that be have succeeded in cutting into muscle. It's difficult to live in an environment of increasing expectations and reduced resources. And this type of workplace defintely puts a strain on how we communicate. Stress always does. So here's some tips:

• MANAGE EXPECTATIONS -- BEGIN WITH YOURS. You can only do what you can do. Even the most organized and productive person has a breaking point. Know what your boundaries are and when you're approaching them, then tell yourself it's OK to admit that you're human. Set challenging and reasonable goals for yourself and allow yourself some breathing and "contingency" room to get things done.
• MANAGE EXPECTATIONS -- THEIRS. Once you know what your timelines and boundaries are, communicate that to the person waiting for your response. They might not like being told that you'll be getting back to them next week instead of tomorrow. They might even be upset and disappointed. Even this is better than them thinking you're responding tomorrow and them getting more angry by the day when you don't respond for a week. As difficult as it may be, explain the reality. No communication at all is a void, and if you don't fill it with information and expectation, the client will fill it with anxiety, anger and disappointment. And those emotions destroy relationships ... and business.
• MEET EXPECTATIONS -- BOTH OF YOURS. Now that you've set the expectations, make sure you meet them. When you say you're going to do something, do it. It's as simple as that. That's how you build credibility and distinguish yourself from the competition. Much better to have a client, colleague, boss or employee dealing with a realistic expectation and you meeting it, than just thinking you're not responding at all. It lowers the stress for both of you.

For the past month or so, I've been shopping for "just the right" couch. I finally found one last week. It was the right colour (well, OK, it's a tad darker than I'd like -- life is full of compromises, right?), the right size (maybe just a smidgen too large, though it still fits), the right price (hey, leather's expensive so a higher price is justifiable, isn't it?) ... and then the delivery date. What?! Eight to ten weeks? Are you kidding me?

At first, I couldn't believe the lengthy waiting period. We have already sold our old couches and are watching TV in the rec room downstairs while our upstairs family room is being renovated. As nostalgic as this "college dorm" look is, I wasn't planning on two and a half months of this. Then the salesman said something that made a lot of sense. He explained, "Most other furniture places will tell you they'll deliver in 6 to 8 weeks, but that's just not so. We tell people 8 to 10 weeks, because that's what it really is. And if you get it early, bonus."

He was absolutely right. Now I know that we'll be a couple months without our furniture and I'm planning on using that time to paint, refinish the floors, and choose accessories. In other words -- he communicated a realistic situation and managed my expectations. I, in turn, am grateful to him for being upfront. You can use this same technique with your clients and work mates. I think this approach sets that furniture company apart from many others. You can position yourself uniquely too, just by being upfront about managing expectations.

When you find yourself overwhelmed and simply unable to respond when you (or they) hoped, let the people know. You deserve to be relieved of undue stress and your client deserves an answer, if only to advise them when you'll respond in full. That's managing expectations, stress, and relationships. Allow yourself some breathing room and keep others up to date. Now, that's worth communicating.

WHERE ON EARTH IS MARION? In addition to communication coaching and consulting, here's where I'm presenting in the next few months. If you're attending, let me know! Or if I'm coming to your area and your organization is interested in receiving communication training, just drop me a line at Marion@MarionSpeaks.com :   June 8, 2011: OMSSA (Ottawa, Ont) June 15, 2011: Vitalize (Edmonton, Alberta) July 27: IAAP Education Forum and Annual Meeting (Montreal, Quebec)

Until next time, here's to ...
Better communication, Better business, Better life!
Marion Grobb Finkelstein
Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author

www.MarionSpeaks.com
Marion@MarionSpeaks.com
www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks  

© 2011 Marion Grobb Finkelstein
WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete tagline with it: Communications expert, author, professional speaker Marion Grobb Finkelstein teaches individuals and organizations across Canada and beyond, how to improve their businesses and their lives by improving their communications. Chat with her Facebook www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks  or sign up for her FREE weekly e-newsletter "Marion's Communication Tips" at www.MarionSpeaks.com

When I was in university earning my Biz Admin degree, several decades ago (yeeks!), there was lots of speculation by the futurists and scholars about how much "spare time" we all would have in future years. Well, those future years are now here, and boy, did they have that one wrong. We're all busier than ever! And that makes communication even more challenging.

With technology, we're "plugged in" all the time. Expectations of response times have never been so high. We are being pulled in every direction and interrupted constantly with pings from our mobile devices, phone calls, social media and people knocking on our office doors with enquiries. Here's a tip that will serve you and the people you're working with:

COMM TIP: Batch, batch, batch

Batching like tasks together and doing them all at once is a HUGE time-saver. Research suggests that every time we are interrupted, it takes about 15 minutes for us to get our mind back to where we were. This greatly impacts productivity and adds to our stress levels. Batching helps to simplify that.

For the next week, try batching together your return phone calls, your email, your social media. Block off an appropriate amount of time to attack the pile and stay focused. Close your door if you need to. Turn off your email alert if you find it distracting. Stick a sign on your door "please do not disturb, meeting in progress". Resist the temptation to grab the phone or even to glance over and see who's calling. Stay on course.

Yes, there are exceptions to this approach -- and I'm not going to get into them right now. We're talking about creating a new approach to how you group your communication tasks so you have time to both respond AND to communicate proactively. So just for now, no free passes.

Here's another wonderful thing about batching: not only does it save you time and stress -- use it with your clients, colleagues and bosses and you will be saving them time and stress too!

• COMM TIP: Have "batch sessions" with your clients, colleagues and bosses ;o)

 

(PS: Yes, I see the humor in the above point and reference to "batch sessions". It's deliberate because, although communication challenges are no joking matter, maintaining a sense of humor is a strategy to handling stress -- it helps)

Batch together all the little questions you have and ask them all at once in one email, one phone call, or one visit. You will appear super organized and very respectful of other people's time. It's a great technique to earn a reputation of being professional and easy to work with... and (here's the best part) ... it will help YOU too. You can even ask them to do the same.

Making time for communications can be difficult. Using the "batch technique" will lighten your load just a bit and provide some relief. And when your thinking about activities to schedule and batch together, remember to take time to note all the communications you did right. So, what are you waiting for? Batch away!

Until next time, here's to ...
Positive communication,
Productive relationships,
Powerful results!
Marion Grobb Finkelstein
Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author
www.MarionSpeaks.com
Marion@MarionSpeaks.com
www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks  

© 2011 Marion Grobb Finkelstein
WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete tagline with it: Communications expert, author, professional speaker Marion Grobb Finkelstein teaches individuals and organizations across Canada and beyond, how to improve their businesses and their lives by improving their communications. Chat with her Facebook www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks  or sign up for her FREE weekly e-newsletter "Marion's Communication Tips" at www.MarionSpeaks.com